Septic Overflow

They changed my schedule at work. I no longer work on Sunday. This will probably prove to be a good thing. However, I have to say that it was nice having a slow day and then going back to just four regular days. The week didn’t feel as long, even though I worked five days in a row. Now, I will have two days off and five regular days. We will see how it goes. Hopefully, it will work out for the best.

Since they changed my schedule I didn’t have to go to work yesterday, which meant I got a four day weekend. I had a four day weekend for Christmas, the New Year and this weekend. I’ve gotten use to them, I wish they were standard every week!

Now that I am no longer a subcontractor I get paid time off. I’ve been told that I will have 11 days for vacation. I probably won’t get to make a trip to the East Coast this summer, like I had hoped. What we will probably do is take several short trips over the year. If I take three days off at a time (Friday, Monday, Tuesday as an example) we could have three decent vacations. I would then have two days leftover for the possibility of another weekend getaway or just a couple of days off for needed relaxation.

There are so many places that I would like to visit. I would definitely like to go back to San Francisco. That city was amazing and I am anxious to get back there. I’d also love to go back to Bend, Oregon. There are plenty of other places we could visit. EQ and I really need to plan a few trips and request the time off. Though, we also need to start saving money for these trips we’d like to take! Which is hard when we’re saving for so many other things we would like to purchase this year (a new range, microwave, furniture, computer equipment). Hopefully, we’ll get to take a few trips. I need as many vacations as I can get from work. That place truly drains me! In less than a month I will have been there for a year. Hard to believe!

Better News

In the better news department, I passed that damn Security+ exam! I knew I had passed the exam, but I just got the actual certificate in the mail. It is so nice that I didn’t waste $266! It’s also nice to know that I won’t lose my job because I didn’t pass it! They’ll have to find another reason to fire me. I’m sure it wouldn’t be hard for them to do!

I’ve been trying to decide which exam I want to take next. I would like to have CompTIA’s A+, Net+, Linux+ and Server+. Several people at work are studying for Microsoft’s Windows 7 certification because we are planning to roll Windows 7 out next year. As much as I would like to be certified in previous versions of Windows, I feel like it would be going backwards.

I would also like to get back into web development. I’m not great at it, but I do love it.

What can I do?

I have been cleaning a lot today. First time I’ve cleaned the house since I got back from Tennessee. I really enjoy having a clean house, but I just have not felt like cleaning at all. I almost feel like there is no point. During the week it will just get junked up again because I won’t feel like cleaning.

I had a meltdown the other night. It seems like I can get through the day without thinking about Mom and then when I go to bed that is when it hits me that she is gone. The other night I got to thinking about the fact that my birthday is next week and the woman who gave birth to me is no longer alive. I was in bed early that night because I had to go to work the next day. EQ was outside doing some gardening. I grabbed my phone from the bedside table and sent him a message asking him to come upstairs. I am so thankful I am with him. If I were still in Tennessee I would have family, but I wouldn’t have someone to hold me in their arms and wipe away the tears.

I fell asleep that night and woke up the next morning feeling a little better. I finished out the week without a major meltdown. Today as I was upstairs, sitting beside the bed folding laundry I got to thinking about the clothes I was putting away. How some of them were the last clothes my Mother saw me wearing. Of course, I had another meltdown.

In the past few years I have had a couple of friends who have lost their parents. At the time I thought I understood how they felt. No, I did not. You honestly cannot understand the pain until you have lost a parent. It truly hurts and it seems as though the pain will never go away.

The question “What can I do?” has been on my mind a lot lately. What can I do to help battle/cure cancer? What can I do to honor my Mother? The only thing I have thought of is starting a new blog to write about my Mother. There is also a part of me that wants to get involved in the cancer community, but I don’t know where to begin. I feel like I would be alone because I know EQ wouldn’t join me. My family is of the mindset that no one really wants to cure cancer because they make too much money from maintenance drugs. I feel like I need to do something. I can’t just cry and move on. Even though my Mother and I have had (still trying to get used to the past tense) our differences, we loved each other and I feel like I need to do something to honor her and (this may not be the right thing to say, but it’s the best I can come up with) maybe make her death not be in vain.

When I came out of work today it wasn’t hot, the air was crisp and the sky was a gorgeous blue. The friend from work that I carpool with dropped me off here at home. I grabbed the keys to the Golf and went to the grocery store and spent a small fortune on junk food. When I got home I went out into the garden and took a few photos of some flowers. I need to clean the house tonight. I am really hoping to go to the park in the morning where they are launching hot air balloons from. That should make for some spectacular photography!

The feeling I have is reminiscent of the morning after a stormy night. I sincerely hope this feeling lasts!